Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Vagina Is the New Nipple

If you haven't heard by now, Britney Spears is sharing her vagina with the world. She's been going out with Paris Hilton and decided to go all the way with this publicity stunt and flashed the Paparazzi. Paris and Britney are also conveniently reported to be hosting the Billboard Music Awards together, which explains why they're pretending to be friends and going clubbing. But did Britney need to go commando? Why not just go Lohan and show a nipple? Once again, Sherlock Joelmes is on the case. Cue intro music.


Something is coming. Something big. I am Jeff Goldblum and Britney's vagina is the ripples in the Mountain Dew on my desk. Britney's publicists are freaking geniuses, and I'm all over their strategy. They are trying to soften an upcoming blow...job. Have you heard the rumors of a possible Britney/K-Fed sex tape? Last we heard, there is no tape. But I say that there is, the original rumors must be true, and soon it will be all over the internet. A sex tape of Britney would create massive shock and awe throughout the world. It could possibly even be a career killer for her...unless a bridge is created between the Britney we know and the Britney we are about to know. There's cleavage and then there's hardcore sex. In between there is...drumroll...exposed vagina. And who better to expose your vagina with than the one person who has had a sex tape released and remains an A-list celebrity?

Britney's sex tape will be released soon. So says Sherlock Joelmes.


Fine! I'll give you a link to see the pics! Stop asking! Just don't click this at work.
Drunken Stepfather

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